


You're my heart, You're my soul

by h7uckl0ver



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Best Friends, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Frustrated Donghyuck, I feel bad for Hyuck, Is this a kissing book?, Jealousy, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan-centric, Lee Gahyeon - Freeform, M/M, Movie Night, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Oblivious Mark Lee (NCT), Platonic Romance, Sleepy Cuddles, frustrated, haechan's dad is just there lmao, haechan's mother is adorable, it goes from friends to enemies to lovers, mark is an ass sometimes, nct - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-18 10:28:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28865544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/h7uckl0ver/pseuds/h7uckl0ver
Summary: Donghyuck can't handle the platonic cuddles and kisses anymore. He wants something more than just a friendship, he wants Mark’s love.i was inspired to make this after i listened to you’re my heart, you’re my soul by modern talking
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 3
Kudos: 61





	1. the canada air

**Author's Note:**

> this is going to be updated about every two days.

Math was never easy for Donghyuck. Art and writing were his strongest suits. Maybe back when he was in elementary school, he excelled in math, but that was simple multiplication. As of right now, he’s staring at his trigonometry homework with a blank expression. Nothing made sense to him as he tried to remember what the teacher had taught him a few hours ago.

He just blanked out and immediately gave up without a thought. Picking up his phone and unlocking and contacting the first person he knew that would help him with his homework. He truly hated this high school burn out phase he was going through.

_What happened to that gifted kid back then?_

Minhyung Lee, the smartest student in their grade and the valedictorian in elementary and middle school. Crazy how time flies and he’s still hiding in his shadow. It’s still quite odd at how the two make such a good duo. They were separated for a while since Minhyung accepted an opportunity to study abroad for a year in Canada.

Suddenly he became Mark Lee, and everything about him changed. He was still Minhyung, the smart, handsome nerd with glasses, but there was something about him he must have brought back from Canada. He was more confident and sociable; I guess you could say he was part of the popular kids.

That’s crazy, huh?

Minhyung being a badass, wearing those tight skinny jeans and those random chains dangling from his clothes. There was something about that Canada air that made him glow-up like that. It made Donghyuck fall for him even harder.

Yeah, Donghyuck has had a crush on him since the 7th grade. Now, they’re in their junior year, struggling and barely passing. He had always known that he was gay, but he wasn’t so sure about Minhyung. They would share a few quick pecks on the cheek or some late night cuddles when they were cold.

There were so many moments that screamed, “I’m gay!”, but there were other moments that also screamed, “I’m straight! It was just platonic, Donghyuck.”

The conflicting feelings of coming out to your best friend and confessing was difficult to deal with. There never really was the right time to squeeze in this topic with everyday conversations.

lee donghyuck:

hyung, i need some help

its urgent!!!

minhyungie<3:

hyuck

it’s 2am. why are u up so late

lee donghyuck:

its the trig homework

like, this shit makes no sense

pls help me..pretty pleaseee

minhyungie<3:

i will send it to u tmmr

go to bed donghyuck

lee donghyuck:

i can feel ur negative vibes through my phone

we should get some ice cream tmmr after school

minhyungie<3:

dude im lactose intolerant

ive been telling u dis for the past 7 years

lee donghyuck:

well u can just get coffee or smth

yk like we usually do

minhyungie<3:

im sorry but me, jaem, and gahyeon are hanging out tmmr

sorry

lee donghyuck:

well thats ok.

i’ll just be doing stuff for my art portfolio

minhyungie<3:

maybe we can watch a movie this friday

like usual

lee donghyuck:

you should bring the snacks this time

half my pantry is gone bc of u

minhyungie<3:

ok ok fine

see u tmmr

lee donghyuck:

night night (≖ᴗ≖✿)

He turned off his phone and softly sighed. Slightly rubbing his eyes, because of looking at his phone for too long and being awake at such a late hour.

Donghyuck tried to contain his disappointment. He did this very often, cancelling plans to go hang out with his others. Not that he had a problem with it, he should be able to hang out with whoever he wanted. Nowadays, he has been neglecting him, and he’s supposed to be the best friend here. Things like that make him doubt their friendship.

He closed his eyes and began drifting off to sleep in a very uncomfortable position, but he was tired and had to wake up at 6am tomorrow.


	2. guilty feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Though Donghyuck doesn't want to feel this way, he can't help it when Mark is constantly pushing him away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: POSSIBLE ED (not erectile dysfunction)  
> i swear there's gonna be fluff soon, i just need to get some angst in there. im sorry if it seems like this is going nowhere.

Going to bed at 3am was not the best decision that Donghyuck had ever made, but he’s done worse. The sky was gray and gloomy, not the best vibe to start off the day. Its grey-ish colors were sad but it gave him comfort. 

It was quite contradicting, but so was he. 

The mind of Donghyuck was quite confusing. The random videos that play inside his head that make him laugh out of nowhere, or the scenarios of him and Minhyung in his head. But somehow, the random memories in his head all have something to do with him. 

He’s made a large impact on his life, whether he knows it or not. Most likely not, but that’s perfectly fine. Ten years from now, they’ll be looking back when they were in 7th grade, pulling pranks that they saw on Youtube. Then getting caught and sent to the principal’s office, but still having a grin on their faces. 

He would do anything to go back and have that same playful Minhyung. Not that there was anything wrong with the current him right now. He just wanted the boy who used to make time for his best friend and having water balloon fights every summer. The current Minhyung, the one who pushes him away, the one who left him behind when he needed him the most. 

The feeling of wanting his attention and being so attached to him made him feel guilty about himself. He shouldn’t be feeling this way, but it just so happens. He shouldn’t feel jealous every time he’s talking to a girl and they’re getting too chummy. 

He shouldn’t be feeling this way, when Minhyung and him are just friends. 

Donghyuck has mentioned this problem about feeling neglected, he was told that things would change. Of course that didn’t happen, but it didn’t stop him from feeling hopeful. 

The sun was appearing out of the grey clouds; it was beautiful to see the sunrise. He loved to live in the moment, seeing such beautiful scenery like this made him lucky to be alive. It was the little things that made him happy. 

Looking at the clock, it was half-past six, and his sketches all over his room. Walking out his room, he did the usual routine. 

Wash his face, brush his teeth, mouthwash, and cover up his acne scars. 

Though Donghyuck looked absolutely beautiful with his blemishes and acne scars, those were just some of many things that he was insecure about. 

After doing the usual morning routine, he walked back into his bedroom and grabbed his school uniform from his clothes valet and put them on. He was somewhat thankful that the school required uniforms. If he wore the clothes he wore outside of school, there was going to be a higher chance of him getting made fun of. It’s crazy how people make fun of others just because of the clothes they like to wear. 

Once he finished getting dressed, he went downstairs and greeted his mother. He then gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek before grabbing his breakfast. His breakfast consisted of lemon flavored air. 

Everyone had always told him that breakfast was the most important meal of the day. But he was so used to not eating anything in the morning, it just became a dangerous habit. He knew it wasn’t good for him, but every time he would try to eat, he would end up feeling sick to his stomach. 

After he left his house, he checked his phone to see if Minhyung sent him the homework answers. 

Nope, he was still left on read.

He didn’t really have a ride to school or know how to ride a bike so he had to walk to school. Him and Minhyung would walk to school every morning before he left for Canada. When he came back to Korea, they’ve just become more and more distant. It saddened him, but there was nothing he could do. 

Even though Minhyung hates it when he doesn't call him Mark, Donghyuck loves it. It was just something about his name that made him feel safe, he felt like home. It reminded him of a happy childhood. 

On his way to school, he spotted Mark walking into the bakery near the school. There was a girl following right behind him, that must be Gahyeon.

God, she looked gorgeous.

Donghyuck kinda looked like a stalker because he was standing behind a nearby tree, intensely staring at his crush. But it's not like he was stalking them, it just so happened to be a coincidence. Minhyung and Gahyeon looked like such a great pair, the ideal couple. It was a position that Donghyuck couldn't fulfill. 

After realizing he probably looked really creepy watching them, he then continued walking to school. 

He was greeted by his super ultimate bestie, Huang Renjun. Given a slight peck on the cheek, then being squeezed the life out of him. He would definitely date Renjun if he wasn't taken, I mean what's there not to like about him. 

Seeing Minhyung walk through the school doors made his heart stop. He was about to talk to Minhyung about the recurring situation that keeps happening, but was then stopped by a few other people swarming Minhyung.

There were many things that Donghyuck hated, things like saliva, feet, or bell peppers. But those were just minor things. The one thing that he hated the most was enormous crowds, it was way too overwhelming for him to handle. So it was just best for him to avoid them before he gets nervous.

He walked away from the crowd and headed towards his first class. First period mathematics made him want to curl up in a ball and cry. He sat in the very back for a few reasons, to avoid other people, and so he could sleep without getting noticed.

Minhyung sat with him today, which first was actually at first. But it was also off and made him skeptical. He looked over to his right and saw Minhyung giving him a small smile.

“Minhyung, why are you sitting next to me,” Donghyuck whisper-yelled.

There was a puzzled look on his face. “Am I not allowed to sit next to my best friend?”

“No, but it's just unusual that you're near me at school.” He replied.

He wants something from him, that’s why he’s sitting next to me. This is the perfect time to talk to him though.

“What are you talking about? We’re always together, all the time,” Minhyung insisted.

Donghyuck took a slight breather before gathering all the courage he has.

Here goes nothing.

“No, we aren’t ever together. Inside or outside of school,” Donghyuck said explained.

“Well-” Minhyung’s words were being cut off, Donghyuck was not going to get shut down this time. He was for sure going to finish what he intended to do.

“Stop it. Don’t tell me we’re together all the time when you know damn well that’s not true. You’re constantly pushing me away to hang out with others, and it’s fine to have other friends. But we haven’t had a proper conversation in months, Lee Minhyung.” Donghyuck complained.

“Look, Hyuck-” Minhyung stammered.

“You don’t get to call me Hyuck, it’s Donghyuck to you.” He argued back.

Whoops, he accidentally got too aggressive.

“I’m sorry, Donghyuck, I’ve been busy lately. I don’t have the time to hang out with you. But, we’re still on for Friday, right?” Mark said, slightly mumbling the last part.

Donghyuck slightly scoffed in disbelief, “Are you seriously asking me that? Might as well be shitting my pants right now.”

What does he think he is? Some kind of god? Yeah, he may be built like one, but he sure isn't acting like one right now. 

“So..is that a yes or?” Mark inquired.

“No, it’s a no. Maybe think about all the shitty excuses you’ve said to me since you came back from Canada.” Donghyuck spatted out, grabbing his stuff and moving to another seat.

 _Well, that went well_. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's kinda cool to see that people like my stuff, like all i do is write about my life.


	3. meaningless affection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Donghyuck is confused why Mark is at his house at 1am.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm super sorry for the exTREMELY late update, school is just getting in the way. but go listen to first love and odd eye!!

Based on last week’s events, it was clear that Minhyung and Donghyuck weren’t on good terms. With Minhyung giving him soft glances and puppy eyes, Donghyuck gave him hard looks. This time for sure, he was not going to fall for his tricks. He decided to stand firm and stay true to his word. 

Well, that plan was discarded entirely when Minhyung knocked on his window at 1 am. He threw rocks at his window and whispered incoherent words that he couldn’t make out. 

It didn’t seem like Minhyung would leave anytime soon, so he decided to let him in. Letting him climb up the tree that was near his window. 

“Hey, Hyuck.” Mark quietly whispered while he made his way over to Donghyuck’s bed. 

He looked so good under the moonlight, and his jet black hair parted so well. He was the literal definition of perfect, minus his stubborn attitude and Minhyung slapping him when he’s laughing way too hard. 

“Hello, Mark.” Donghyuck bluntly replied. 

_Ouch_ , he used Mark instead of Minhyung. 

“You’re calling me Mark now?” He said with slight hurt in his voice. 

This was weird. Why would Minhyung care about such little things when there were much bigger problems than a stupid name. Not that his name was silly or anything. 

“You hate it when I call you Minhyung. More importantly, why are you at my house at 1 am.” He quietly said. 

Donghyuck, a sensitive person, was just about to burst into tears right now for absolutely no reason. Even just someone slightly raising their voice would make him tear up. He was a crybaby, and he knew that. 

“I hate other people calling me Minhyung, and it’s special when you do it, though,” Minhyung told him. 

Special? Was he special? Of course, he was special, like as in a childhood friend special. 

“I’m also here at your house at 1 am because we have many things to discuss, mostly about us.” Minhyung finished. 

“Is it okay if we, you know, cuddle?” Donghyuck said, mumbling the last part. 

It was the perfect time to do so. A cuddle session at 1 is while they pour their hearts out—a bunch of tears, mostly Donghyuck’s, and quiet giggles.   
Minhyung slightly nodded and grabbed Donghyuck’s hand and dragged him down onto the bed.

A small “oof” noise was made when Donghyuck landed on the bed unexpectedly. Their arms and legs being tangled. Their breathing slowed down; it was calm. 

“Is there anything you would like to talk about?” Donghyuck said as he looked up at Minhyung. 

“Yes, I’d like to talk about how I’ve been treating you.” Minhyung said.

Finally, he’s admitting that he’s in the wrong. This was a big deal for Donghyuck. Minhyung was never the one to own up to his mistakes. Continually making excuses and blaming others instead of blaming himself. 

“Okay, carry on.” Donghyuck said as he waited for Minhyung to say something. 

“Um, clearly, I have been neglecting you and pushing you away, and I’m sorry for that. I truly am.” Minhyung said. 

So far, so good. Minhyung seems to be sincere about it this time, or he’s just a terrific liar. Maybe Minhyung’s a sociopath who’s good at faking his emotions. 

“I promise, I promise you that I’m gonna start spending more time with you.” He continued. 

“How do I know if you’re not lying?” He quietly said, trying to avoid Minhyung’s gaze. 

Minhyung placed a finger under Donghyuck’s chin, making him look at his eyes. 

This didn’t feel like best friend behavior _at all_. 

He feels like he’s being put on the spot. He’s feeling overwhelmed as they continue looking at each other. 

“Well, under these circumstances, all my feelings kinda spill. I wouldn’t lie to you like this.” Minhyung told him. 

What Minhyung is saying, he’s lied to Donghyuck multiple times without him knowing. That sucks hearing it coming from him. He can’t help it, falling for him repeatedly, especially when he pulls things like this. But it hurts him every time, and it does sound like Donghyuck should get over him. It’s not exactly that simple, though.  
  
His face, his smile, his hair, his touches, his affection all make Donghyuck weak. 

His heartbeat quickened every time he planted a kiss on his head. Donghyuck looked up at the ceiling, trying to fall asleep and clear his mind. He didn’t want this night to end, but he knew the next day, nothing would change.   



End file.
